Just Jie Yang now.

The fight between good and evil shall end here today, with the Mighty Morphin’ Power Ranger pwning the stupid Chinese’s ass.

Watch as the power rangers morph to form their invincible alter egos.

It’s morphing time, Rangers!

But the representative of Chinese comes. It’s the evilllll Rita~! Zoh-my.

Oh no you won’t, you evil witch, let’s call on the megazords, Rangers!

Muahahaha, once again, good triumphs over evil, and Chinese is thrashed by the Megazords.

Actually, all I wanted to say was, today’s Higher Chinese Paper was pretty easy. Because I read two articles that were related to the topic today (in fact, the ones that came out).

Arigato, Chiu!

Trust me. The only person who would possibly make me change my mind now is Mao Zedong. But too bad, he’s not around.

Right, Mao? And the power rangers can’t save me too.

Although Red ranger always pwns the evil monsters’ asses.

Is that smoke billowing from the Megazord’s leg? Oh no! Looks like Chinese is stronger than the power rangers.

What should we do now, rangers?

Maybe I should just mug Higher Chinese now.

You know, the Higher Chinese O levels are tomorrow, and I’m the last in my paternal side of the family to get A1 for HCL, and pwn both my bro’s asses, so I decided to pia a bit for the last stretch.

My mom decided that I should get all the help I need, so she dug out some old notes given to us by her friend. She didn’t say whose notes it was though.

So I flipped through.

Then I saw some letters in green that caught my attention.

I started to panic. Then my eyes followed the letters.

This school crest looks familiar.

NANYANG GIRLS…

…HIGH SCHOOL.

Siao. I tell you, this can cause me to die of heart attack leh. See the NYGH symbol so many times at once. Hmph.

This is has only made learning Higher Chinese worse.

(If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you probably won’t know forever.)

Anyway, good luck for Higher Chinese tomorrow, people!

Some cool video of a GP teacher scolding a RJC student, shared by Victor. Those going RJC, enjoy.

Hm. Perhaps getting retained isn’t such a bad idea after all.

Sorry, I didn’t feel like doing a proper post today.

Formal education is a waste of time, according to the parent featured in the newspaper today for his children’s feats, such as taking the O levels at 12 and 14 years old, and the third kid is going to take it at nine. I am amazed by the fact these children still have friends after their ordeal with the academic rigours. After all, who would want a friend who takes his O level at 14, or 12? It will only make me feel inferior to be 16 and taking the O level equivalent.

Siao, GEP, so smart, of course can slack lah, I so dumb, gotta mug everyday for my A1.

I was reading the Economist, borrowed by my brother, where I chanced upon this article. Apparently, people in China were digging graves. No, not for the ancient treasures that were buried with the bodies to give them prosperity and wealth in their later lives, but rather, the real gold now, was the corpse itself.

The corpses stolen were mostly female. Why? This was because there were buyers for such female corpses, which were to be buried with the buyers’ deceased male relatives, and allow them to be married in the other world.

Okaaaay. And according to the article, “the custom has a long history. In the legends of the classical romance of the “Three Kingdoms”, the warlord Cao Cao finds a corpse bride for his son who died in 208 AD at the tender age of 13.” Wow. And there we are, admiring Cao Cao for his brilliance in the battlefield, while he was marrying his son off to some corpse bride.

And there is even a grading system for corpses.

I should start a bid on Ebay.

• Wet (Recently buried) Corpse, selling for 33, 000 yuan, in tip top condition, only has a few contusions caused by the poor conditions while stealing it. Warranty lasts for 9 months, willing to negiotiate.
• Dry Corpse, bones white, still has bits of flesh on it, warranty expired, will sell for 340 yuan. Buyers contact me ASAP.

It will be such a hit. After all, China’s market is booming and the people there are supposed to be spending more nowadays, isn’t it?

I tell you, this is a very grim business. People in China kill women for their corpses, simply because digging one is harder. I mean, it’s just sick, ain’t it? The guy who does that should be multilated after death, and buried beside his victims to ensure that he will have as many wives as he had killed, and all angry with him for eternity.

Got back my report card today.

All A1s?

No.

Are you sad?

No.

Then why am I pissed today? Because my wonderful teacher has given a B grade for Civics and Moral Education, which is graded by an interview with the form teacher.

Reason? Because I gave a politically incorrect answer.

Is it wrong to give a politically wrong answer? The question during the interview was if I used the school value system in my daily life, and why. So I said I don’t. I have my own set of values, which are far more applicable than the school’s in my daily life.

I was under the impression that the school feels that we shouldn’t just stick to the value system, but rather, develop our own set.

So is it that my values are wrong? Is working hard to achieve what I want, learning for the sake of learning (and not for results) wrong? Is it wrong to disagree that global perspective is not really a truly applicable value that can be used in our daily lives?

I don’t think so.

It’s not so much the grade that matters to me, but rather, why I got this grade that irks me. I simply do not believe that students should be made to agree to any stuff that is chucked to them, just because an authority feels that it is good, which in this case, the school feels so.

While the school value system itself is a reflection of what each student is expected to achieve, I do believe that I have already done so, and thus the A grade in Sec 3. Going to Sec 4 has been a maturing process, and I have realised my value system has changed.

Am I expected to just continue giving the same answer just because, hey, it gets me an A?

It is unfair to bring a person down by a grade just because of the “correct-ness” of an answer.

I suppose you could say my answer was correct, but the model answer, that I use and apply the school’s value system conscientiously in my daily life is more correct.

But hey, we’ve hit a little snag.

Correct and more correct? Oooooo, I think my value system is getting attacked here.

I proceeded to ask my teacher, who had interviewed me, why in the world did I get a B.

“Oh, you never answer properly what, so you get B lorh…”

“But I can explain properly my own value system what, why should I get a B just because I don’t give a politically correct answer?”

“Aiya you answer like that, get B lorh.”

After 5 mins, as teacher and enthusiastic student proceed down the stairs, the engaging conversation continues.

“Wah lao, then just because the answer is not politically correct, you expect me to lie and tell you a politically correct for my A grade. That’s so unfair lah…”

“Sometimes you must…”

“What, lie arh?”

“Yah, you must know when to do that sometimes, you know, sometimes, cannot be too honest one…”

“WHAT?! You want me to lie?”

“Sometimes you have to give a politically correct answer one…”

So, I am to lie now. Hmmmm that kind of comes in conflict with my honesty principle, and the school’s integrity value.

Okay, then how do I answer the questions during the interview?

“How do you apply the school’s value system to your daily lives?”

“Errr I lie during interviews to get the perfect grade!”

Wow.

Oh my. Wonder how is it like if the school would like us to lie in interviews.

Ay, wait, probably not the school. But just my teacher.

I shall seek a second opinion, hopefully, a second interview. If it’s another B, I’ll accept it without any regrets, but till then, I shall seek excellence, and bounce back despite the teacher’s decision. That’s resilience.

Joy, Teamwork, Integrity, Global Perspective, Excellence, Resilience.

There. Our school values, I see I’ve fulfilled Excellence, Integrity and Resilience.

“Hello there, I appreciate your effort to make your stand clearer. Certainly, you have, in your follow up post, clarified that you are criticizing the joke and the not other party (which was strongly worded in your first post). There, it wasn’t too difficult was it? I look forward to more interesting yet non-objectionable content.

have fun blogging,
Mr. Happy aka Mr funny not-aka Mr Pissed Off”

I am seriously in doubt to which who is the one being the dominant niao-er now. Oh well, he says my efforts are appreciated.

So someone give me a medal?
Or roses?

This is some complication somewhere, and it’s definitely not in my brain.

Oh dear. The difficult task of responding to Mr. Funny is killing some brain cells in me. Thank God for the excess back-up brain cells.

Oh well, looks like I will go more in-depth into the skill of

Superb pronounciation. Thank you, Chiu Lao Shi, for the Festival of Chinese, which has boosted my profiency in the amazing Chinese language.

I’m sure most people who mix with me should know that I have a problem controlling my tongue. As seen from the last post and the last last person, Once frozen, Jokes can kill, you would probably seen, erm, my inability to mince my words.

And apparently, my secret somebody has discovered my blog! Oh my! What an honour!

And he’s none other than Johnathan! Jon Heng, a.k.a Brad Pitt, a.k.a. Hottie, a.k.a MR FUNNY!

Well, I have, as of usual, incurred his wrath. Heh. This is what he sent me via email (thanks to the lovely advancement of technology, I am able to get people’s comments/complaints faster).

“Hello there, can you make your blog post about “mr funny” more mild or take it off. Certainly there is a better way to blog without defaming the other party directly or indirectly. Please do so as soon as you are free.

In any interest, what was the joke? i remember vaguely that i did not intend to make a joke and i do not have the habit of joking at the lunch table.

Please give me your reply(when you would make the changes or not at all) so that there is a follow up for my reference.”

Countless jokes where you made, dear boy. Plus, I won’t remember (I mean duh right) your lovely chances at attempting humour. And no, unlike in previous cases where I will mince my words and say sorry, I won’t do it this time.

I maintain my stand that you are not funny, and your attempt to make a joke (whether it was a conscious effort, I won’t try to dispute with you. After all, it is your brain, right?)is terrible, despite practice on unsuspecting victims everyday.

Weekian also told me that another classmate of mine, you know, the one who said verbal abuse is a form of bullying, (read the post, it’s further down the timeline), asked him whether jieyang hates him.

Heh. Not obvious meh?

So please, take my survey to let me see/defend the err of my ways.

Hm, and back to the subject, John Heng, I ain’t sorry about my words, and at the same time, I hope you can stop those futile efforts to blend in (by telling jokes). Perhaps Zijie, Yun Xian, they all, can understand your brand of humour but sorry, not everyone is like them.

As wise sayings dictate, parents should not scold vulgar language. This is an extract from a blog post on http://missaddicted.blogspot.com/ .

“tooot.&. ytd , i heard my dad say FUCK.
LOLOL
His workers kept on calling when we having our dinner luhs.
my dad fed-up go say
FUCK OFF LUHS. ‘
i say 1 million times call later , i eating.’LOLOL
Than my mum ask me whats the meaning of fuck. i anyhow say la if not my mum kill my dad.“

Ok, apart from me being shocked by the fact that her mother does not know what’s the meaning of erm, fuck, I think I am pretty amazed by the fact that this girl hasn’t heard her dad scold fuck before. Come on, those who haven’t heard their dad say fuck, please raise your hand.

See. No one.

Maybe a rare few haven’t, but I’m also one of the rare few who live in a household where “fuck” is a relatively common term.

We (my father + my brothers) use fuck to describe our daily experiences.

“That fucking instructor kaobei me today leh.”
“Dunno what the fuck the teachers are doing to us lah.”
“Fuck lah, can I just dao this thing.”

Just some common examples. Fuck is a indescribably useful word. You can say fuck to express extremity, (I’m so fucking happy), you can say fuck to scold people “Fuck off, bitch.”, and you can use it to describe stuff (Where’s the fucking key?).

It’s just so damn useful.

Plus, you can use it to bond with vulgar people. Speak their lingo, see, just need to say fuck every 3 sentences to appear as vulgar as them.

Perhaps my parents should not let me use the word fuck at home, cause I might evolve into a foul-mouthed creature.

Although you probably know that it wouldn’t happen, especially since I’m such a nice and good boy. You know, right?

So please, parents, let your emotions and the vulgarities flow smoothly out of your mouth sometimes, it may do good for your children. Just imagine kids who enter army without scolding fuck a single time before (and not knowing the sacred word too).

God, so deprived.

Scold fuck today, people.

And of course, remember the cold joker from yesterday? As proof that he is self-deluded and trusts his apparently non-existent abilities to tell jokes, I shall show you visual evidence.